...is the title of the book we studied this summer in our adult Sunday school class.
Today we were blessed to have
Dr. Jeff Newman from Faith Baptist Bible College/Theological Seminary in Ankeny join us to share his conclusions of what we might learn from reading the book,
When Sinners Say "I Do" by Dave Harvey. I would love to give you a video link to the entire hour of Sunday school, but I don't have one :-( Sooo, I'll just give you a highlight or two (or four). And if you're up for a study of your own, read
Philippians 4:1-9 to find how Paul expressed God's view of (and solutions for) conflict in a relationship. Marriage is the primary relationship that God uses to mold us into the image of Christ, but all of our relationships ought to be seen from God's perspective.
Interesting side note that we had testimonies today from one who's been married less than 3 months as well as one who's been married more than 35 years ~ both have learned that our selfish bent is very evident in the marriage relationship! At least one of Dr. Newman's comments stuck in my brain:
God loves us enough to keep us in a place where we know we NEED Him. Hmmm... And here's today's outline:
~ Seeing Our Relationships Through the Lens of God's Word ~
~ The Sufficiency of the Word of God for My Relationships ~
- The Lens of God's Holy Character and Works: Who is God? What is His character? How does He work?
Whether we realize it or not, our ideas about life, needs, marriage, romance, conflict, and everything else reveal themselves all the time in our words and deeds, inevitably reflecting our view of God. (p.20)
- The Lens of God's Description of the Relationship: What does God say in His Word about this relationship? What words does He use to describe the other people in my relationships? How does God define my relationship with this person/these people?
Your spouse was a strategic choice made by a wise and loving God. Selected by him, for you, from the beginning of the world, your spouse is an essential part of God's rescue mission for your life. (p.71)
- The Lens of God's Evaluation of the Situation (Facts and Interpretation): What are the facts in this situation/relationship? How am I interpreting the facts of this situation/relationship? How do I see God at work in this relationship glorifying Himself and conforming me to the image of His Son?
The sides in this war are not male versus female, husband versus wife, or controller versus enabler. It is a clash of desires -- desires of the flesh against desires of the Spirit. It is trench warfare for supremacy of the human heart. (p.48)
- The Lens of God's Instructions on My Response: What responsibilities of personal obedience has God entrusted to me in this relationship? How do I measure success in this relationship? (Am I measuring success in relationships on the basis of God's instructions to me, or on the basis of some desired outcome of my obedience?)
Mercy doesn't change the need to speak the truth. It transforms our motivation from a desire to win battles to a desire to represent Christ.
- Mercy Before the Fact: Practice Kindness
- Mercy When Under Attack: Do Unto Others
- Mercy After the Fact: Cover Sin
(p.82-90)
Quotes in italics are examples from the book,
When Sinners Say "I Do," with page numbers listed. Outline is by Dr. Newman.
Today we looked at Philippians 4 to find answers to the questions listed in each bullet point (I'm not giving you the answers ;-)). We started looking at
Romans 12:9-21 for a similar study ~ which is dealing with an
enemy! (not your spouse) and found God is the God of vengeance, so we can trust Him to deal justly with our enemies for us. Other suggested passages were Romans 13 (authority); 2 Corinthians 4; Philippians 2; James 3.
Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.
Romans 12:21
And, one last plug for FBBC/TS and Dr. Newman ~ You might look into attending a seminary module on
Biblical Counseling held each August (you can audit for just $100 plus books), or find a
college/seminary class with Dr. Newman as the sole instructor. Good stuff in the battle against the idols in our hearts.
Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.
Proverbs 4:23
~♥~